Stay in Touch - Community Life

Apart from my trips back to England the last 15 years my community is in Wanaka,NZ.
It is a very special place for me, it has a population of around 4,000 people and because it is a all year round tourist destination the place swells up to 20,000 plus during the summer holidays and about 10,000 plus for the ski season.
When I am back in England I realize that if heaven is on Earth, for me it is here in Wanaka.
When I first came here at the end of 1993 my life had fallen apart from the break up of my marriage, I was drawn to Wanaka because my best friend was always talking about the place and it was miles away from a place of sadness.
6 months later that sadness was forgotten, in its place was not only a beautiful town by a lake with snow capped mountains but also a place filled with happy, friendly and adventurous people.
They stopped and talked, they listened, they supported and they knew how to enjoy life.
Wanaka and the people opened a lot of doors for me that gave me the answers to a lot of questions that needed answering, before Wanaka my life was falling apart and the people around me where unhappy and negative.
Living here has made me realize just how important community is for a happy and balanced life.
The sharing on all aspects of life here is I believe the most important factor. Whether we need help or want to have an adventure,or just to be heard, there is someone, somewhere and something here to fulfill that need.
Wanaka also attracts a lot of retired people and in the 15 years I have lived here I have not met a fearful person but back in England most of the older generation live in fear, that is sad considering they have been through at least one world war which was to create a more peaceful world.
The youngsters here because of the nature of the place grow up full of adventure and positive growth.

I was in England for 13 months in 2001/02, it was sad to see the continuing decline of community life.
To each individual the most important aspect of life is family, the second most important aspect of life is our community. Strong family life is a good foundation for a strong community. Unfortunately these days our families are separated all over the world which means the communities are separated too, there are no strong foundations in community life.
While I was there I tried to create a space where people could gather to express their concerns, views, ideas, skills and life's experiences.
This space is called a sharing circle/group, my experience with these have been amazing, not only for dealing with my issues on a personal level, they gave me the confidence to gain back control of my life and most of all the strength to stand up and be heard.
I have seen a big change in others and the way issues are resolved not only on a personal level but also on a community level.
I did not have any luck in getting this off the ground on a community level in England, mainly I believe because of the unknown factor of this process but also after spending a day walking and talking to people in the community where I spent all my childhood and most of my 36 years there, they had either given up, did not trust the council,or lived in fear of going out at night to such meetings. I still feel very strongly that this would be a good process to unify communities.

The situation our communities find themselves in is an accumulation of issue’s over the years that have not been dealt with in a resolving way.
Society is quick to pass judgment and blame on certain sections of our community for the unbalance that is there. This is not a healthy way to resolve the issues, it will only alienate them even more, and after all they are all still living within the community.
We have to look at new ways to resolve and rebuild.

These sharing circles/groups could be a way for communities in England to get together and start rebuilding to create a place they will be proud and part of, it will help people take responsibility for their own destiny.
We can not rely on local council and government they have enough on their plate's just to keep their own policies in order, the past proves that well enough.
The only chance people get to voice their concerns etc is in open forum at a council meeting for those that can be bothered to go. It is important for members of the community to have a space to be heard.

Group sharing not only empowers the individual they also on a group level bring people together to achieve certain goals. It is an experience we have to experience to understand how groups can create positive change.
I believe, these groups are very much needed if we are going to live with trust and support.

We live at a fast pace of life and aspects of our life need to slow down so that we can deal with issues as they arise. By connecting back to our communities through group sharing, it will bring our focus back home.
Sharing Circles/groups especially in a circle have a calming influence on the direction it takes, mainly because we do not feel alone, we feel supported, and we are heard.
Fear of being alone is a big issue for many people, in our communities the separation is very deep, this creates a fear of being alone.

The structure of these groups will vary from area to area, according to the desires of the people and families in each area. There is a section on sharing circles in this section of the web page.

We do have in our society AA and drug abuse groups, but for them it is the last straw, we should not have to wait till it is nearly too late to seek help.
If we had support groups in our community for all aspects of life’s issues we would not be in the state we are in now.
It is never too late to look at new ways and ideas to deal with these issues.

One of the cause’s I believe is that with the media being focused mainly on world affairs especially over the last thirty years, has taken our focus away from our own back yard.
With the fears and distrust that has been created in our world we have switched ourselves off and let our communities fall apart. It is time to change our focus.

I remember 25 years ago we had a street party to celebrate the Queens silver jubilee. The people in our street had a ball, met neighbors they had never met before and there was talk about doing it every year. The community spirit was like I’d never experienced before.
Unfortunately people got caught up in their busy stressful lives and 25 years on that spirit is almost gone, those parties never happened.
But England has a tremendous spirit of togetherness, which has been proved on many occasions when it is needed.

Whether we are aware of it or not we have choices of direction in our life, come on lets make the right choice and go in the right direction.
To create peace on earth we must start with peace at home, and watch it grow.

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